Dating anxiety involves feelings of fear, worry, or uncertainty around dating and romantic relationships. It can be influenced by insecurities, past negative experiences, fear of rejection, or worries about worth and attractiveness.
Dating anxiety may involve overthinking interactions, worrying about how a romantic interest feels, assuming the worst, or becoming highly self-critical. For some people, anxiety can lead to self-sabotaging behaviours as a relationship becomes more serious, while others may avoid dating altogether or cancel dates at the last minute.
How Therapy Helps:
Sex therapy can help build confidence in self-worth and attractiveness, creating a stronger sense of security when navigating the uncertainty and vulnerability that can come with dating. Therapy can also help reduce the attention given to negative assumptions and fears by developing skills for staying present and shifting focus away from overthinking. Mindfulness can be a useful tool for this.
Therapy may also involve unpacking past dating experiences and developing a more balanced understanding of what happened, including separating facts from interpretations. It can also help reduce pressure around dating and romantic relationships, clarify dating intentions, and identify and respond to red flags. Rather than focusing on what the other person may be thinking or feeling, the focus can shift towards personal feelings, needs, and whether the connection feels positive and fulfilling. This can help build a greater sense of agency in dating.
Where dating anxiety is connected to sexual performance, a sex therapist can explore underlying fears, negative self-talk, and past experiences, while supporting greater confidence and comfort in developing a fulfilling sex life.